Full Circle

I WROTE THIS LAST YEAR, BUT IT IS ONE OF MY FAVORITES.

So I have come full circle on something and it feels fantastic.

When I was at the ripe age of 19 and planning my first wedding, I was not the nicest person to be around. I was always right, things HAD TO BE MY WAY!, and they had to happen NOW! . I, of course, did not see any issue with acting like this. I felt that I was entitled, and anyone who disagreed with me could go to hell. I think a lot of us have gone through this....I think there are some who are still going through it.

Moving on....I was the least nicest to my mother, which in retrospect was stupid since, a) she is my mother and b) she and my father were paying for the ill-fated event. I remember talking down to her, probably embarrassing her in front of sales associates, and undermining her authority. I was cunning and manipulative and in a word - a bitch. I even got upset when she fell at church and broke her leg during my wedding planning. I was sure she was trying to sabotage me.

I remember after Jon and I were pronounced husband and wife, I looked at my new Mother-in Law, who was bawling her eyes out, ( out of sheer sadness, not happiness) and my own mother, who sat there with an odd expression on her face. I later asked her what was going through her mind and she told me she as just happy it was over. And that's all she said....it took me several years to figure out what she meant.

Fast forward......this past week, a customer of mine emailed me and told me she had a friend who was a mother of the bride who needed help dressing for the rehearsal dinner. Now, over the course of my career, I have helped many many MOB's , so I had in mind what I would show her, etc.

The next day, this pretty lady walked in and asked if I was Rosemary, and as I told her I was, I knew she was my MOB. I immidiately started pulling clothing for her and talking about the wedding. I asked her if she was excited and she said something that struck me.....she said she would be happy when it was over. I had a flashback of almost 10 years ago when my own mother said that. This beautiful woman started pouring her heart out about how her only daughter was acting like a wretched, ungrateful being ( my words, not hers) and I looked up and saw a true sadness and heartache in her eyes. And I truly understood the error of my ways a decade ago.

It was right then that I decided that this woman needed someone to be nice to her. Especially someone who was in the same generation as her daughter. I excused myself from the sales floor and dedicated myself to helping her. I sat in front of her dressing room and helped her choose her clothing, told her how beautiful she looked and helped her narrow her selections. By the end of the sale, I could see that my efforts had helped somewhat. As I closed the sale out, I told the MOB that, I too, had been an ungrateful bride. I thanked her for allowing me to bring things full circle by being nice to someone else's mother, when they themselves weren't being nice.

I later spoke to my customer friend that referred the MOB to me. She told me that the MOB was so excited with her purchase that she drove straight over to show her. This means alot to me.

When I got home, I called my own mother and told her what had happened, and in the middle of it, I broke down sobbing and wailing and asked her for forgiveness. I told her that I hope that I somehow righted the situation with the universe by coming full circle. And I truly hope that I did. Karma is a bitch, but it's nice when it gives you a chance to make things right. I think these chances are rare, but completeing the task is the greatest reward of all.